My son was breech for most of my pregnancy. Unfortunatley he couldnt be turned by EVC as the cord was around his neck 3 times. I therefore had a planned caesarean at 39 weeks. The staff at the hospital made the experience as intimate as possible but I always felt like I had missed out on a natural delivery and I found the 4 nights in hospital afterwards dented my confidence as a mum a little. I also found that breast feeding was difficult to establish.
I went for an antenatal check up on my due date and as I was hoping for a VBAC they agreed to try and do a stretch and sweep. My cervix was still posterior and high so the midwife couldn't do the stretch and sweep but she could just about insert a fingertip. I was therefore booked in again for 4 days time. At the appointment the midwife confirmed that baby was now engaged for the first time.
The next morning I had a show, which I suspect may have been dislodged from the internal on Thursday. At my next appointment at 40 +4, my cervix was 2cm dialated. It was still a little posterior but the midwife was able to pull it forward and to do a good stretch and sweep - she could even feel the babies head! The midwife said she would like me to rest on Tuesday and to go back on Wednesday for another sweep as hopefully this would encourage labour to start naturally. The midwife also confirmed she would give me a date at the next appointment for my waters to be broken to try and induce labour. Thankfully this was not necessary as labour started that evening!
After the stretch and sweep, I thought a good walk might at least help baby to get in a good position and stop me feeling anxious about being 4 days overdue. Every day overdue felt like I was getting closer and closer to another c-section. I went for a walk around my local shopping centre. Whilst walking around I did have lots of what I thought were Braxton Hicks and they were more uncomfortable than normal. I called my husband to ask him to come and meet me as I was feeling quite uncomfortable but whilst they were quite regular, they were not painful at all and so I presumed they were Braxton Hicks.
I went home and after dinner the Braxton Hicks seemed to be stopping. I went to bed at 9pm and the Braxton Hicks had completely stopped. At 9.45pm I woke up with a strong period pain cramping low down which then turned into back pain. I thought at the time that it was more painful than normal but tried to go back to sleep, thinking it was probably nothing and that even if it was the start of labour, it would be hours yet until I was in established labour. (One of my main worries was that I would get to hospital only to be sent home again). I had been warned that as I didnt labour at all with my first son, if I did go for a VBAC it would be like a first time mum and so to prepare myself for a 12-16 hour labour.
I felt another contraction about 3-4 minutes later which was also a bit painful and I found that I wanted to get on to all fours to cope with it. I decided to go the toilet and as I walked back down the hall, another one came. This time it was strong enough for me to stop and groan a little. I called downstairs to my husband to tell him I thought this was it! We sat on the end of the bed to time the contractions. I was having them every 3-4 minutes and they were lasting 1 minute each. I kept saying that I still wasn't sure this was really labour starting as I was still laughing and in good humour!
I then called Wexham Hospital and spoke to a midwife who asked how frequent my contractions were and how long they were lasting. I told her every 4 minutes and around 1 minute long. I also told her that I was trying for a VBAC. The midwife asked if I had childcare sorted for my first child and asked me to come in so they could check me over.
The contractions were starting to get more painful and I was pretty sure it was really labour. I was groaning through them and was leaning over the coffee table to deal with them and my husband was rubbing the base of my back to help ease the back pain. I thought established labour would be ages to go yet, but as the midwife had said to go in to be checked, I called my sister round at 10pm who watched my son whilst we left for the hospital. The contractions were now quite painful, always feeling them low down and moving to my back, but I was coping okay by hanging off the side handle and groaning and growling. The journey seemed to take ages (in reality about 30-40 minutes) and I was watching the clock to see how frequent they were and to prepare myself for when another contraction was likely to start.
We arrived at Wexham Park Hospital at around 11pm. Thankfully the rain had stopped as I had to stop in the car park whilst I had a contraction and then again at the entrance.
We went straight to the Labour Ward and a midwife said that she was the lady who had spoken to me on the phone. She asked me to wait in the waiting area and she would be straight back to see me shortly after she had taken another lady up to the postnatal ward. Shortly after I had another contraction and started growling again. Another midwife came to see me and was worried that it sounded like I was pushing. I assured them I wasn't but another midwife came and marched me to a delivery room just in case!
The midwives quickly read my notes and asked if there was anything out of the ordinary that they needed to know. I confirmed that I was a VBAC and had rhesus negative blood. I then had another contraction and they asked me if I would like some gas and air. I said that I knew the contractions would get a lot worse and that I might need to pace myself. She suggested that they did an internal on me to see how dialated I was. The midwife also said that when VBAC mums start begging for a c-section she knew this meant that baby would be coming soon! They asked me how I would like to feed the baby. I explained that I had been planning to bottle feed as I hadn't been successful breastfeeding my first child but that I might give it a try if everything went okay.
The midwife confirmed that she could feel my cervix and that the membranes were bulging and I was 7 cm dialated! I then started on the gas and air which took the edge of the contractions at this point and I could cope with them like the ones in the car. I put on a hospital gown and they also asked my husband to get a baby grow, vest and nappy and put them in the cot. I then shouted "what.. already!?"
My midwife told me that when she had gone to put my name on the board and that the midwives couldn't believe that I was already 7cm and that they were all routing for me because I was a VBAC.
They needed to put a tube/needle into my arm in case I needed to be rushed to theatre if there were any complications with the VBAC. This was put in quite early on, but because I was sweating so much (my hair was wet and was sticking to my neck), the sticking tape wouldn't stick and the tube kept coming out. They therefore tried both hands before then putting it into my left arm. I looked like a pin cushion when we came home!
They kept a fetal heart rate monitor on me all the time to ensure that baby was okay as a dip in heart rate could indicate a problem with my c-section scar. However, the leads were quite long so I could move around the room. Every time they looked at the monitor they confirmed that baby was very happy and the heart rate pretty much stayed between 120 and 160.
After about 20 minutes, the gas and air wasn't helping as the contractions were much stronger and unbearable. I begged for something stronger and was saying that I couldn't do it anymore. The midwives were great and told me that I was doing it! They asked me if I would like some pethadine. I said yes and she said that she would need to check me first as it might be too soon to baby being born. Within a minute I started begging for an epidural as the pain was now excruciating and I was screaming. My midwife told me that she thought I might be close to delivery and as it could take 40 minutes for the epidural to start working, it was probably too late. They suggested I get on all fours and lean over the bed to see if this helped. My husband also rubbed the base of my back during the contractions. At this point my waters broke with a gush. I felt the need to push slightly beforehand. I told the midwives that my waters had gone and they check to ensure the baby had not passed bowel movements. Everything was okay.
At this point I was begging and screaming very loudly! I was saying "please" and "why won't you listen to me, I really need an epidural". At this point I was already starting to feel like I needed to push so I starting begging again for an epidural. They called the doctor who would administer the epidural and confirmed that she would be there soon. When the doctor arrived, they laid me down on my side and she started to feel along my spine. At this point I started screaming that I needed to push as I couldn't fight it anymore. They then told me that I couldn't have an epidural as I was going to delivery my baby then.
My midwife did a quick internal and said that I could push with the contractions. This was a different type of pain to the contractions before, equally as painful as the last contractions but a different feeling. The urge to push took over me completely. The contractions were no longer coming fast and lasting a short while, instead they lasted longer but I had more of a gap in between, as if my body knew that I needed a bit of time to get my breath back.
I was screaming as I was pushing and the midwives were advising me to get angry and to push down into my bottom like I was going to have a poo. I said that I thought I was going to poo as I could feel it and they confirmed that this was my baby I could feel and not poo!
They also said to close my mouth and use all my energy into pushing. I kept saying that I couldn't do it and started asking them to knock me out! The midwives kept saying that I was doing it and that they were really proud of me. I remember thinking in between each contraction that I would really focus on pushing the next time, but once the contraction peaked I would start screaming again!
I wanted to fight the pushing because of the pain, but my body just took over and I couldn't not push. The midwives suggested I go back on all fours and lean over the bed. This helped a little as my pushes felt much stronger. But it was very painful and I was still screaming. I also found that biting on the back of the bed helped! I was growling as I was pushing but I could feel that the pushes were better.I was wiggling my bum from side to side and up and down with the contractions which seemed to help a little. I was still saying that I couldn't do it and the midwives kept telling me that I was doing it. They asked me to put my hand down and that I would feel my babies head, I said that it felt too soft and they assured me it was my babies head.
Shortly afterwards I felt the baby crowning as it really burnt, like everything was on fire. This was probably the most painful part to push through. The midwives then told me to do little pushes to get my baby's head out. I tried little pushes as best I could but my body was pushing without me wanting too!
I then felt the head come out and it was a massive relief once it was as the burning pain eased straight away. However, with the next contraction the shoulders came out and I could feel that the midwives helped guide them out one shoulder at a time. Again, it was an enormous relief once the shoulders were out and immediately I felt the rest of my baby slipping out. All I kept thinking was that it was finally over and I had made it through it!
The midwives asked me to put my arms down so that I could take my baby. I remember leaning back off the back of the bed and looking down to see my baby looking very wet and pink and blood covered but completely beautiful. I was too shocked to cry but will always remember his little face at that point. He cried a little and was born at 1am - just 2 hours after we had arrived at the hospital.
My husband looked down to see whether we had a baby boy or a baby girl and told me that we "had a blue one!" The midwives said that they thought he was a big baby boy and we were taking guesses on how big he might be. Our baby Harry was 9lb 4oz!!
With the midwives help I then stood up off the bed so that I could lay down. I was still holding Harry in my arms and we were still joined by the cord. Once I laid down the midwives gave me some towels to wrap Harry in to make sure he was warm. I was also able to take off the wet and bloody hospital gown and was given some clean sheets to cover myself with. I was then given an injection in my left thigh to help deliver the placenta and my husband cut the cord and had his first cuddle with Harry.
I cuddled Harry for a little while whilst the midwives started to give the cord little tugs to see if the placenta would come. The midwives were still trying to get my placenta to come free but it wouldn't come out. They explained that it was probably because my labour had been so quick. Eventually, after 35 minutes, my placenta was delivered.
The midwives were all saying how well I had done and how quickly everything had happened. They were laughing that it was a good job that I didn't labour with my first baby or Harry would have been born it the car on the way to the hospital!
I needed about 12 stitches for a second degree tear but I was given pain relief and the gas and air also helped.
I apologised for screaming the hospital down and the midwives said that I had done great, especially with a 9lb baby. My midwife said that my labour was likely to be more painful because it had progressed so quickly and my body had not had a chance to get to grips with the contractions in phases. She remembered that she had told me at the beginning that when VBAC mums start begging for a c-section she knew baby was on its way and that she was proud as I had begged for an epidural instead!
I cuddled Harry whilst they finished my stitches, which took about half an hour. I was cuddling Harry skin to skin and he was sucking lots. My midwife asked me if I would like to try and breast feed him as he was trying to latch on himself! I said okay as everything else had been so natural and Harry pretty much latched on himself. The midwives then left us alone to spend some time with our new baby whilst they went to try and write up my notes as they didnt have time during my quick labour.
As everything had gone so well, we were offered a 6 hour discharge from hospital so we were home just after breakfast! So much better than the 4 nights in hospital after my section!
Thrilled! I did waiver towards the end of my pregnancy when I was starting to feel anxious about the birth but I am so pleased that I did it! The bond I felt with my second child was instant... we did it together!
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